


Truth Of The Matter

by centreoftheselights



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Ambiguous Logince, Antagonistic Janus Sanders, Bad Things Happen Bingo, But it's Roman's POV and he's really not their biggest fan rn, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Holding Oneself to Unreasonably High Standards, It could be platonic or romantic depending on your interpretation, Language of Flowers, Listening To One Another, M/M, Miscommunication, Pancakes, Patton and Janus aren't unsymp, Post-Episode: Putting Others First - Selfishness v. Selflessness Redux | Sanders Sides, Romangst, Surprise Gifts, Sympathetic Logan, Taking Credit For Someone Else's Work, Unearned Reputation, cooking breakfast, negative self-talk, reassurance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-05
Updated: 2020-06-05
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:13:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24558979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/centreoftheselights/pseuds/centreoftheselights
Summary: Roman prepares a "Good Morning!" surprise for the other Sides. It doesn't go to plan.
Relationships: Logince, platonic Logince
Comments: 36
Kudos: 169
Collections: Bad Things Happen Bingo, Centreoftheselights' Bad Things Happen Bingo 2020





	Truth Of The Matter

**Author's Note:**

> One of my [Bad Things Happen Bingo prompts](https://potestessemagishomosexualitatis.tumblr.com/tagged/bad-things-happen-bingo):
> 
> ooo for the bingo thing, undeserved reputation? deceit takes credit for something roman did and gets all the praise + recognition and no one believes roman when he says it was his idea. obv logan can see through deceit's bullshit and comforts roman and lets him know he knows the truth so there's some fluffy logince at the end
> 
> I'm pretty sure this was sent before the latest episode but it ties in so well, I couldn't resist.

It had been a rough few weeks. First the whole debacle with the courtroom, then Remus's unwelcome visit, then the wedding itself and all that ensued…

Roman thought it was high time for a little cheering up.

He made sure he awoke early, before any other sides would be up. Then, at the kitchen table, he set to work.

A bouquet of flowers to brighten everyone's day! A gift for them all to enjoy equally, so there's no need to think about – well, never mind. He summoned up an elegant glass vase, and then moved on to filling it. Indigo irises for Logan, bright sky-blue daisies for Patton, purple windflowers for Virgil – and of course, last but not least, red carnations for Roman himself!

Perhaps once he would have chosen roses. But, well. _Things have been less than rosy as of late…_

He took a moment to regard his finished work, glowing with pride. Creating something beautiful, no matter how small, was always a source of joy to him.

Then, with a sickening crunch of a feeling, he realised what he had forgotten. All at once, the joy and satisfaction washed away, and in rolled a tide of doubt and disgust.

Should he add something to the bouquet for Deceit? Yellow hyacinth perhaps, or snapdragons? But no, either of those would ruin the composition, not to mention clash horribly with the colour scheme!

No, Roman thought to himself. He would not let the slimy snake ruin this for him. He would stick with his original design, and if Janus didn't like it – well, hopefully he wouldn't even _see_ it, although he had been joining them for meals more often than not lately…

Scowling at the tangle of thoughts inside him, Roman stomped over to the stove. Pancakes! Nothing controversial about pancakes! A nice big stack that everyone could help themselves from! Who didn't love pancakes?

He quickly whipped up some batter and began cooking. The methodical work of flipping pancakes and adding them to the stack waiting on the hotplate soon helped calm his nerves. Soon, the stack was almost complete. Everything would be fine, everything would be great, everything would –

Then he turned, and Janus was sitting at the table.

He locked eyes with Roman. Neither of them spoke.

Roman turned back to the stove. He carefully finished flipping the last pancake, before carrying the stack to the table.

“I'll summon some toppings,” he said, awkwardly. “What do you like?”

“Butter will suffice.”

He couldn't _not_ have seen the bouquet. It was right in front of him, in the centre of the table. But he didn't comment on it.

Roman nodded, and summoned a spread of toppings. Since he knew everyone else's preferences, he only bothered with their favourites. No point in wasting food.

He sat down, served himself some pancakes, and began to eat. Across the table, Janus did the same.

Still, no-one spoke.

Then Patton arrived.

“Oh my goodness, what's all this?” he cried, clearly excited. “Pancakes? Oh, they smell so yummy… and there's flowers too! Thank you so much!”

Roman's heart warmed, tension beginning to ease out of his frame.

“Janus, did you do all this for us?”

In a moment, tension returned. Roman was pulled as tight as a bowstring, ready to snap.

Janus locked eyes with him across the table.

“Of course not,” he answered, slow and smooth. “Why would I do something like that?”

Patton bounced on his heels.

“That means you did, right? Oh, you're such a sweetheart! Come here!”

Patton hugged Janus tightly, squealing with happiness.

Roman felt as though he had been punched in the throat. He wanted to speak, but he didn't know how to form words.

“What's wrong? I heard Patton scream.”

“I believe that was merely a cry of excitement, Virgil, although I too am curious about its cause.”

“Guys! Janus made us pancakes for breakfast! And he got us flowers, oh and they're in all our colours, isn't that the sweetest thing you've ever seen –”

With a cold sinking feeling, Roman realised that the opportunity had passed. If he tried to claim responsibility now, it would look as though he was merely trying to steal Janus's thunder – typical Roman, they would say, jealous and petty and ungenerous…

He jumped suddenly to his feet. All eyes turned towards him.

“I… have a great deal of work to attend to!” he said suddenly. His plate was still half-full, but the thought of eating another bite of these accursed pancakes was turning his stomach. “… I hope you all enjoy your breakfast.”

He cleared his plate, and went to leave the room.

“Roman!” Patton scolded as he reached the doorway. “Don't forget to say thank you to Janus before you go!”

Roman paused. He didn't turn back.

“Fear not!” he said, keeping his voice as calm as he was able. “I have already given him all the thanks he deserves.”

Then he hurried back to his room, and locked the door.

#

About an hour later, there was a single sharp knock at the door. Logan.

“May I speak with you for a moment?”

Roman considered lying to get him to leave – but he didn't want to be that person. Whatever it was, he could surely get through it for five minutes, and then go back to wallowing.

He quickly checked his appearance, and let Logan inside.

“What brings you to my door?” he asked, forcing a smile.

“I wanted to thank you,” said Logan. “For the pancakes. And the flowers, although holding no emotional resonance for me, were both aesthetically pleasing and symbolically rich.”

Roman blinked at him once, twice. Then his hands started shaking. It was taking all his strength not to fall apart.

“H-how… did you know?”

Logan inflated slightly, always glad of a chance to show off his deductive skills.

“My suspicions were first aroused by the pancake toppings provided. Chocolate chips and whipped cream. Cherries and dark chocolate sauce. Crofters Wild Blueberry Organic. These are precisely our chosen favourites, a fact that Janus had no motive or opportunity to learn before this morning.

“Of course, there was a possibility that you had simply provided the toppings while he did the majority of the work, but the flowers suggested otherwise. While it is possible that Janus is familiar enough with the 'Language of Flowers' to represent me with _I. germanica_ , symbolising wisdom, I doubt he would choose to assign Virgil with _A. hortensis_ , which represents both protection from evil and excited anticipation. And I feel certain he would not have symbolised Patton as _F. amelloides_ , which means both 'carefree happiness' and moral purity.”

“Innocence,” Roman corrected. “I wanted it to mean… innocence.”

“I believe Patton was distracted by the lack of representation for Janus himself in the bouquet, taking it as a sign of modesty. But taking into account your recent misgivings about his presence, the true explanation seemed obvious to me.”

Roman nodded stiffly.

“You're welcome,” he said. “Now, if that is all –”

“What I don't understand is why you allowed Janus to take the credit.”

Logan's words settled like a lead weight upon Roman's chest.

“It doesn't matter,” he answered, reflexively.

“Inaccuracy is always my concern,” Logan said.

“It was a simple misunderstanding. Patton made an assumption, and… it's fine. I…”

But he couldn't force himself to say he doesn't care. Because that would be a lie, and _good people don't lie_.

“You could easily have corrected him,” Logan argued back. “I would have done it myself, if I didn't believe you must have some reason for –”

“ _I'm not that petty_!” Roman snapped, far louder than he'd intended. “No matter what the rest of you may think of me, if Patton finds it easier to believe that Janus is the one creating gifts for you all then I –”

He bit his tongue.

“I do not _need_ recognition. I didn't _do_ it to receive thanks. It made him happy, didn't it? That's what matters. Not how I feel.”

“It matters to me,” Logan said quietly.

Roman blinked at him.

“Accuracy matters. Truth matters. Recognising one's accomplishments… matters. You deserve to receive thanks and praise and gratitude where your efforts brought those feelings about. Your contributions to the group are important, and your voice should be heard –”

Logan's voice cracked for a moment, and he swallowed heavily, adjusting his tie.

“Apologies,” he said, sounding hoarse. “I came to deliver you the thanks I felt you deserve. If you wish, I will take my leave of you.”

“Logan?” Roman spoke before Logan even had a chance to turn away. “The same goes for you, you know? I know that we've had our differences but… I really do try to see what you contribute. And you deserve thanks for all the clarity you have tried to give us. Even if we didn't always listen as well as we should.”

Impulsively, he reached out, and grabbed Logan's hand. To his surprise, Logan didn't pull away, and when Roman looked up, his eyes were slightly watery behind his glasses.

“We were talking about you,” he protested.

“Truth matters,” Roman repeated back to him. “Recognition matters.”

“It does,” Logan said softly, stepping forwards. He was inside Roman's space now, close enough to touch.

Roman grabbed his other hand, stepping in closer. When Logan didn't pull away, Roman sighed, and leant their foreheads together.

“Thank you,” he said slowly. “It feels good to be seen.”

“It's important.” Logan said. And then, quieter: “You're important.”

Roman let out a slow breath, and felt Logan breathing against him, and for the first time in days, he felt as though some part of his world was still in one piece.


End file.
